The 11th commandment

NEVER under any circumstances, no matter how tempting the pictures look, should you eat any of the following: Hot Pockets, Chef Boyardee or anything with more than a teaspoon of curry. Your intestines will thank me later...

I was home alone the other day and wasn't very committed to making a big lunch, so I cracked open a can of Chef Boyardee remembering those days as a kid when that's all you would eat. I thought I was going to hurl at the first smell, but I still didn't have enough energy to make something else that would take too much effort, ya know like PB&J. So I forced myself to eat the greasy mess that sat in my lap.


There are few things in this life I regret as much as that decision. No mental image needed.

Need a laugh?

I never pass up a good opportunity to laugh, and this one is worth it. Read through these product descriptions.

http://www.biogenesis.us/products.htm

I have no idea who these guys are, but I'm wondering if the site is joke or what. At any rate, it's always good to know there are people who are more crazy than you think you are...

Don't ask this ninja... ANYTHING!!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=5zvif6WWdSg


Or any of these guys: (The second to last guy is my favorite)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_NQCTbvRnM&NR=1


But you could probably get some cool answers from this ninja. Holy Toledo Balls... I'm dizzy just watching...
http://youtube.com/watch?v=D2kJZOfq7zk&feature=related

Sad, but true...

http://www.videogamesblogger.com/2008/01/22/
world-of-warcraft-hits-10-million-users-worldwide-
making-it-the-82nd-biggest-country-in-the-world.htm

That's right, if you took all the people who played World Of Warcraft and put them in a country (I know, I'm scared too...) they would be the 82nd largest country in the world. Larger than Hungary. It would be a sad little country and I'm assuming 99.134 percent of that population would be 16-35 year old males, all of whom are virgins and have not seen the sun, ever. When they become the 69th largest country, I'll be shopping for a bomb shelter. They aren't a very stable people them Warcrafters...

"You're impressed with yourself aren't you?" "Who wouldn't be?"

So my manager is in a bad mood today because I made a joke at her expense yesterday. She had to leave the room, because 3 of us were laughing too loud and we were, in her words, "driving me crazy!" Being the quick witted genius that I am, I interjected with, "How do you know that wasn't our goal?" She replied that it was working and slammed the door as she left. I took that to mean, "I don't appreciate good humor." Maybe that's not what it meant, but hey, it's my reality, I'll do with it as I please...

This morning I came in to find an email from one of my co-workers saying that my boss had yelled at her for not acting professional enough and turning a serious statement into a joke and how that was childish. Right, because joking is childish, but taking out your anger on someone who had nothing to do with this problem and not talking to the person that made you mad IS mature. Ok, I'll make sure to write that down.

I've always been the kind of person to poke and prod at people I enjoy being around. I'm a very sardonic guy and I have a somewhat darkly sarcastic sense of humor and I make fun of people I like. Just ask my wife. I'm just not sure why this one person has taken such an offense to me. She says she wants me to include her and communicate with her and when I do, she gets her grannie panties in a wad. I don't suffer fools here at work and when she makes a mistake I point it out and then she's upset with me and says I don't treat her with respect. So I don't say anything and then she's mad that I don't teach her. I just can't win. I feel like the freaking Miami Dolphins...

The dungeon...

Don't get me wrong. I really honestly enjoy parts of my job, and I do have to stress "parts". Working with the people here (most of them anyway) is a lot of fun. We laugh together, get angry at the same pinheads together, and just enjoy each other. However, the monotony is wearing on me. Dealing with my supervisor has pushed me to the edge and the fact that her supervisor has turned a blind eye to her potentially dangerous shortcomings makes me wonder whether it's worth staying another 7 months. Should I work for Denver, the department so corrupt I swore I wouldn't work there to get away from her? Or do I stick it out, go to school and chalk this up to a lesson in patience and pray I never deal with it again? I don't know the answer, but every day I lean more and more towards walking away... we'll see what happens.

Happy New Year!!!!

Well, I don't know about you, but I'm glad it's a new year. Spare a few good moments, the last one sucked pretty hard...

I'm looking forward to '08 and here's a quick list of my resolutions:
1. Baby-free in '08. No more children for a while. I want to have 4, but not anytime soon. Besides my wife would kill me. That's not a euphemism, she has threatened to kill me if she gets pregnant in the next 12 months. I can do that, I enjoy living...
2. Get back to my fightin' weight. I'm steadily losing weight and I want to keep it up. I need to be in great shape for the academy and I want to not have to worry about the physical part of it.
3. Run a mile every day. I used to do that, and since it's gotten cold, I've been slacking. Need to do that again.
4. Update blog more. See, I'm already doing good on that one...
5. Not break the law. Haven't had problems so far, but you never know. Besides, they say you have to have easy resolutions so you feel like you accomplish something. So let's add, no smoking, no gay sex, and no gender reassignments. Pretty simple, I should be able to accomplish those things...
6. Spend more time with the family. Yeah, yeah, we all say that, but I really do want to.

That's all I can think of for now, I'll be back for more later...